If you’ve made it this far, I’m hoping you’re feeling good about this challenge. It’s my hope that Sober October is a gateway to an overall betterment of you as a person. The same way I used Sober October to push myself to quit for good, I want others to find what they are looking for, and succeed in their goals.
At a certain point of my first crack at Sober October, I realized that I was doing something good. This good thing was making my life better, but I was frustrated. I felt like I should have started sooner, and I was mad at myself that I didn’t have the courage or strength to quit forever. This frustration convinced me that stopping for good would be foolish, and that I was already too far gone. I convinced myself that I wasn’t they type of person that didn’t drink.
This is the kind of “self-talk” that those in the sobriety community refer to as “The Disease Talking”. If you ask them, this rationale was my alcoholic brain tricking me into self-defeat. I sabotaged myself in to giving up, just as I started to get some momentum. I let my fear and laziness dictate my actions, and after October ended I went right back to my old ways.
After thinking about it more, I realized I was ashamed of past, and I let that dictate my future. I couldn’t go back to prevent myself from taking that first drink. I couldn’t take back the stupid things I did or said under the influence. This inability to change who I was, prevented me from working towards becoming who I wanted to be.
We can’t go back. We’ll never be that rebellious teenager again, looking to have a good time. We can’t erase our past in order to fix our future. We can only make changes NOW that will impact our future in a positive way. Our Delorean only goes in one direction, and it’s the only direction that will serve us. Forward.
Think about it this way… the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago, the second best time is today. Let go of the past, so you can make tomorrow better!
This post is a part of a series of Sober October themed blog posts to serve as inspiration to those who are abstaining from alcohol for the month of October. If you think you have a serious problem with alcohol, please seek medical advice. Resources are available here.
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